The Importance of Trust in a Relationship

The importance of trust in a relationship cannot be overstated. Whether the relationship concerned involves friendship, kinship or romance, without trust it is difficult to form a meaningful bond with another human being. If you do not believe what your lover or friend is telling you and think that there is a chance you could get hurt, as a result, this can affect your ability to form and sustain relationships with other people. You may be less open to establishing new relationships and getting close to people, which can affect your self-esteem.

The earliest relationship you have tends to be the one you have with your parents. They are the ones who instil in you certain values and who you look to for advice and support. Not all parents are there for their children, though, and if you are let down when you are young, it may affect your ability to form relationships as an adult. There are parents who abuse their children – emotionally and physically – and have no qualms about lying to their children if it benefits them in any way. Even when you're treated badly by your parents, you want to believe that you can trust them when you know that the parent-child relationship is so important.

Then there are your friends – the people you are supposed to be able to confide in with your problems. However, they can let you down, too. You may believe that they care about you, but later discover that they have been talking about you behind your back, thus undermining your trust. Perhaps your lack of trust comes as a result of financial issues – such as lending a friend money and never getting it back again – or romantic reasons – such as a friend deciding to go out with the person you're supposed to be seeing.

Trust is also essential when you decide to pursue a romantic relationship, because if you are unable to trust the person you're dating or even married to, it becomes difficult to continue on with the relationship. If you're worried your spouse is going to cheat on you every time he leaves the house or that he is going to gamble your savings away or make a series of ridiculous decisions without consulting you, it is evident that you are in the wrong relationship. Trust provides the foundation for a lasting relationship and so if you do not trust the person you're with, either you have to look at the person you're with or look inside yourself and see what needs to be changed.

The same applies to the other relationships in your life. If you don't trust certain people, it is probably because you have been let down in the past by them or by others, thus affecting your attitude towards relationships. It can be difficult to trust people, anyway, but when you have reason to believe you're going to be betrayed in some way, it is not really surprising if you shy away from relationships.