The Drawbacks of Online Friendships

The trouble with online friendships is their transient nature. When you’re bored and lonely, it’s easy to look for someone you can make a brief connection with in a chat room or on a social networking site, as it passes the time. However, even if you exchange email addresses or become Skype buddies, there is no guarantee you will ‘talk’ again. You just don’t have the same bond as you do with the individuals you encounter in your everyday life – out of sight, out of mind as they say. In real life, you encounter people and you build a bond with them that is harder to break.

That is not to say there is no value in online friendships, but you have to be prepared to put the time and energy into getting to know someone and just because you email regularly and try to keep in contact, your online ‘friend’ may not be quite as committed. It’s frustrating, because usually all you have is their email address, and you can’t keep inundating them with messages until you get a response, because if they don’t want to write back, they won’t. Of course, real-life friends can ignore you, too, but it tends to be a lot more difficult when you’re standing face-to-face and you’re usually given some kind of explanation.

Friends tend to be people you can rely on in a crisis; people who will help you out and support you when things go wrong, but with online friends, you don’t get the same kind of immediacy. You may send an email, but you don’t know when you’re going to get a response. There is also the possibility that your online friend is stringing you along and is not really who he or she claims to be. You could find yourself revealing all sorts of personal details, only to discover that you’re being used for some reason. Your ‘friend’ may end up trying to use the information you’ve provided against you, blackmailing you or trying to hack into any online accounts you may have.

There is always an element of risk when trying to build up any kind of friendship, though. Even when you think you know someone in person, they could quite easily be holding something back or lying about themselves. However, being online makes it much easier for individuals to get away with such behaviour, as individuals can hide behind their online personae. Although it is possible to build long-lasting online friendships, for most people the novelty soon wears off and after a few weeks or months of corresponding, the level of interaction tails off.