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Showing posts with label love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label love. Show all posts

Tuesday, 3 December 2013

Why is it Hard to Tell Someone You Love Them?

It can be hard to tell someone you love them if you're not entirely sure that is how you feel about the other person. There is no definitive explanation of what love is. You may care about someone deeply, but does that mean you love that person? Perhaps there are different types of love – you may love someone as a friend, but saying that you love them might mean something different as far as they are concerned. Even if you're romantically involved with someone and it is clear what you mean when you tell your partner that you love them, there is always a fear that the feeling may not be reciprocated.

Thus, a sense of uncertainty with regards to what constitutes love and a fear of rejection are what most people are concerned about when it comes to making a declaration of their love. Nobody wants to tell their boyfriend or girlfriend that they are in love with them, only to be at the receiving end of a long, awkward silence. When you tell someone you love them, you want to be sure that they feel the same way, although you won't know until you say something. The chances are the other person is similarly afraid and so you both bumble on, failing to say what you're feeling because you don't want to face the hurt and embarrassment of not being loved.

Besides, when is it acceptable to declare your love? If you've only been seeing someone for a week or two, is it really appropriate to tell them that you love them? You could quite easily scare them off if you think you have a serious relationship, whilst they are under the impression you're both just having some fun. Sometimes, it's easier to tell yourself your feelings aren't as strong as they perhaps are, because if something goes wrong, you can tell yourself that it didn't really matter that much to you – after all, you never let the other person know how important they were to you.

Declaring your love for someone isn't something to be taken lightly, because it generally signals that the relationship you have with that person is particularly important to you. Indeed, that is why it is so difficult to tell someone that you love them, because doing so seems to leave you in a vulnerable state. It could be that the other person doesn't feel the same way, in which case you're left feeling rather down, whilst even if you both love each other, there is the potential for the other person to take their love away later down the line. Being open about your emotions and feelings is always difficult, anyway, but when it comes to love there is always an added layer of tension and anxiety.

Why do so Many People Look for Love Online?

Once upon a time, anyone who engaged in online dating was viewed as a bit odd. Why would you have to look online for someone to date when in the past people have always met in 'normal' social situations? However, times have changed. Technology has come to play an ever greater part in people's lives, so that it makes sense to utilise these tools. Online dating and social networking sites make it possible for people to discover people they might otherwise have never met, which can only be a good thing. The Internet has connected people across the globe and so you have a better chance of finding someone you are able to connect with by taking your search online.

Of course, there are problems with looking for love online. There are many different sites to choose from and millions of Internet users, so that narrowing down your search isn't always easy. Plus, when creating an online profile, it is very easy to misrepresent yourself. You can find yourself exaggerating certain qualities and playing down other aspects of your situation, which is all well and good when communication is kept purely online. However, what about if you intend to meet? You can post a picture of yourself looking your most glamorous, but you can't exactly disguise the fact that you're overweight and are losing your hair when you actually meet.

Yet, there have been so many successful instances of people finding love online, that an increasing number of people are turning to dating sites to aid them in their search for companionship. It is so easy to post a picture, write a few things about yourself, look at other people's profiles and get in contact. Within a few hours you could be meeting up with someone in person. This is great news when you don't have a lot of opportunities to meet people in your everyday life. You can read what interests a potential love interest has and decide if you have anything in common. This makes it much easier to hold a conversation when you do actually meet.

It has become more socially acceptable to look for love online. Online dating used to be viewed with suspicion – as if everyone looking for love online was a desperate loser unable to find someone in the real world! Nowadays, it is evident that people from all walks of life use the Internet to connect with people, whether they are looking for love or not. When people don't have much time or opportunity to meet people of the opposite sex in their area, but are interested in finding love, it clearly makes sense to take the search elsewhere and the Internet facilitates this.

Monday, 2 December 2013

The Drawbacks of Looking for Love Online

More and more people have been turning to the Internet in their quest to find love, and who can blame them? Online dating seems like a convenient way to meet people, since you don't have to go bar-hopping and you can establish that you have something in common with someone before actually meeting them. It's a great way to find someone new to interact with if you work long hours and don't have much of a social life. However, there are no guarantees that you're actually going to find love online and, indeed, you may simply find that it is more hassle than it's worth.

After all, you could make a connection with someone only to meet up and find that there is no spark there. Even worse than that; you could discover that the person you thought you were meeting actually lied to you. It's easy to do when creating a profile. You obviously want to appeal to members of the opposite sex and so you exaggerate a little bit here and make up a few things things there and before you know it your profile in no way resembles the truth. If the person you are going on a date with does this, you could find yourself coming away feeling rather disappointed.

You can find yourself pinning all your hopes on finding love online and you forget that it is possible to meet people in real life, too! You might think that it is a hassle to look for a partner in your everyday life, but you never know what's around the corner. You may be doing what you always do, only for something unexpected to happen and for you to meet someone you really connect with. You don't get the same level of spontaneity and excitement with online interactions and even when there does appear to be something worth pursuing, you may discover that there isn't when you meet in person.

There are lots more online dating sites than there used to be, but this means that it can take a lot of time to decide on the right site for you. Even then, you may discover that the site is full of people that you're not interested in and that you keep being sent lots of messages from individuals who you have no intention of replying to. Your inbox may end up full of spam and you will probably wonder what the point of being a member of a dating site is, especially if you have to pay for the privilege.

You might start out thinking that online dating is the most convenient way to go to find love, but you could soon discover that it's just as time-consuming and still as difficult to find someone who actually wants a relationship online as it is in real life. There are plenty of people who will tell you what you want to hear in order to get a date, only to let you down in one way or another. However, online dating isn't all bad, and many couples have found each other by using the Internet, which is why this method of looking for love has obviously become so popular.

The Benefits of Looking for Love Online

The Internet has provided so many options for people looking for love. In the old days, you used to have to rely on meeting people through your friends or picking someone up on a night out. Now, you can go online and look for someone you think you may connect with in person. It may take away some of the spontaneity and there is no guarantee you're going to click with a person you have discovered online, but at least you have the opportunity to look for people who you may have something in common with. Plus, if you're shy or work long hours, the Internet could offer you the best hope of finding someone.

There are many online dating sites to choose from and you no longer have to be embarrassed about meeting up with someone you have discovered over the Internet, as many people do so. Online dating used to be something of a minority activity, but clearly the convenience of this method of finding love has made it much more popular. People just don't have the time to go clubbing or take up hobbies on the off-chance they might find someone they can embark on a relationship with. By looking online, you have a better idea of what you're getting. You can enter in your specific requirements and find a person that you'd like to get to know better.

As well as dating sites, there are also popular forums on any topic and interest you could possibly think of, and there is a chance you could just connect with someone on one of these, although, as with any method of finding a friend or a partner, there are no guarantees! The trouble with looking for love online is that it is easy to raise your expectations too high. You read of all these couples who get together online and you think that you're going to find the man or woman of your dreams straightaway. The Internet may provide you with another method of interacting with people, but that doesn't necessarily mean you're going to end up in a relationship.

However, for many people the Internet is the best way to look for love, because they don't meet that many new people. Once you've been in a particular job for a long time and settled into a routine, it can be difficult to put yourself into different situations where you might meet someone new. Going online gives you another avenue to explore and it is so easy to connect with other people who have the same interests as you. If you're shy, you don't have to worry about coming across as awkward, and if you work long hours you can arrange to go on a date, knowing that you will at least have something to talk about with the other person. Thus, the benefits of looking for love online are clear.

Is it Important to Love Your Job?

In an ideal world you would be doing a job you love, but this is not the experience of many people. Although there are some people who enjoy their job because it is challenging and gives them a sense of satisfaction; for other people a job is just a way of earning some cash so that they can afford to do what they want. For these individuals, it is the prospect of being able to enjoy themselves at the weekend that keeps them going. Everyone is different, though, and so there are those for whom money is not of primary concern.

It therefore depends on what kind of job you have and whether or not money alone is what keeps you turning up on time every day of the working week. Clearly, if you have invested quite a lot of time and money into gaining qualifications that will enable you to pursue a particular career, you want to end up with a job you love, rather than stuck in a factory packing goods into boxes. Likewise, if you have had an apprenticeship and developed specialist skills, you obviously want to be able to put these skills to good use, rather than being stuck in a dead-end job.

If you want to build a decent career, it definitely helps to love your job, because this will keep you focused on getting what you want out of it. If you hate your job with a passion, it is going to be a struggle to stay focused on doing everything necessary to achieve career success. If you loathe the work that is involved in your job, as well as the people you work alongside, it is obviously going to be a challenge to forge useful connections and to give your job 100 per cent of your effort. Thus, you may struggle with the pressure and the weight off expectation and discover that higher rates of pay are just not enough to keep you going.

However, at the other end of the spectrum, there are individuals doing unskilled, low-paid work who are content doing their job. They may be involved in providing a service and helping individuals, which makes them feel good about themselves. If you work with elderly or disabled individuals, you might not be paid very much and it can be stressful, but this may not bother you as much when you get a feeling of job satisfaction. Not all low-paid jobs come with job satisfaction, and many people just do these jobs because they don't require qualifications or experience.

At the end of the day, though, a job is a job and, whatever you do, it helps you to pay the bills and provides you with money to enjoy other things in life. Obviously, it is better to love your job than to hate it, especially since you probably won't get as stressed or depressed about your situation, but even if you don't like your job, there are people in a much worse position. You might hate your job, but at least you have a job and can still afford the essentials in life. Not everyone is that lucky, unfortunately, which is worth bearing in mind.